Merlin: The New Dawn
by merlinfanatics
Summary: After 3 years Merlin finally returns to Camelot, only to find that Gwen has a surprise for him. Two 3 year old identical surprises. Merlin is named court sorcerer and must work to protect the Pendragon family from new threats. Challenges await him as he must go on without his king and see the new heir of Camelot to his throne.
1. Chapter 1

Merlin walked stiffly as he was lead to the throne room by his old friend sir Leon. Were they still friends? Merlin worried that he could sense fear coming from Leon, but he did not blame him. Everyone in Camelot had been taught to fear magic. Merlin wanted to say that he was sorry for not being able to bring the king home but he couldn't bring himself to think of it. Leon finally broke the long silence.

"Gwaine, he um, he was good friend of yours?" The warlock looked at the knight, confused the realised what Leon was asking.

"Yes." Merlin gave a small smile thinking of the good times he had had with the nearly never sober knight and all the times they had saved each other. It was the first time merlin had smiled in the 3 long years he had been away from Camelot. "The first time we met he saved me and Arthu-" his voice cut off as he had a sudden catch in his throat.

Leon didn't want to finish what he had to say either but he took a deep breath and said, "Gwaine, he, he died." Leon paused as Merlin looked up at him in disbelief. "Morgana killed him," he continued. "We went looking for her, but she found us first. She, she tortured him until he told her where you were." This cut even deeper into the wound in merlin's heart. Not only had he lost the king, but his great friend Kilgharrah the wise dragon had died in the last year and merlin had been by his side as one of the two only dragons in the five kingdoms left to pass on to the next world. "Did she find you?" Leon asked, not enjoying the silence.

"Yes," Merlin answered, thinking of how to word what he was going to say next. "I killed her," he said coolly as he looked at the knight who looked shocked.

"How?"

But before Merlin could answer they had arrived at the doors to the throne room. When the two guards opened the doors, Merlin looked in to see Gwen standing beside one of the stain glass windows looking out onto the courtyards. The throne room was just as Merlin remembered it, except there was now only one throne, standing against the middle of the back wall. Merlin began to walk into the room, as he did his heeled boots echoed through the almost empty hall and the doors were shut behind, making a steady thump as they did. Gwen turned around to face him. He gave a small bow, mostly with his head, his torso only moving slightly.

"Your highness." Merlin had always made the effort to treat Gwen with the respect she deserved. He struggled to face her worried about all he had put her through, to return without the king by his side and then to disappear only a few days later. Gwen ran up to him throwing her arms around his neck, hugging him tightly. Merlin returned the hug, they were both glad to finally have a friend again.

"Merlin," Gwen whispered, reveling in her friend's company. "It's been far too long."

Merlin held her tighter. "I know," he responded. "I'm _so_ sorry."

"Well now that you're here," Gwen said with a smile, releasing him, "there's a couple people I'd like you to meet."

She led him out of the hall, and into the corridor. At first he was surprised to the point of speechless at the abruptness, but when the sorcerer found his voice again, he asked, "Where are we going, Gwen? Who am I meeting?"

Gwen just smiled. "You'll see."

A few minutes later, a still-very-confused Merlin is stopped by his friend. "In here," she says, gesturing to a door. She knocks. "Arthur, Arden! Come out, there's someone I'd like you to meet!"

Upon hearing the name, Merlin flinched. It couldn't be, could it? No, he thought, no way. There must be a perfectly fine explanation for that name to be used without even a second thought.

And suddenly, the door opened. Two light tan-skinned young toddlers emerged, looking up at the queen. One a boy, one a girl. Both had dark hair, the girl's black and wavy, the boy's lighter and straighter. Even though they were twins the boy seemed to resemble Arthur much more then the girl did. The girl had a darker skin tone than her brother, and brown eyes in comparison to his blue ones.

A smile spread open on Merlin's face. "Are they-?" was all he was able to say.

"They're mine," Gwen explained, a smile on her face too. She looked down at the young boy, placing a caring hand on his head, playing with a soft wave in his hair, she then back up at her friend. "This one's named after his father."

Merlin already knew, just by looking. He saw Arthur in every inch of them, from the girl's bright eyes to the young boy's posture. There was no denying, these were truly Arthur's kids.

"May I?" Merlin asked his queen.

"Sure."

He knelt down to see the twins at eye level.

"Arthur, Arden, do you know who this is?" Gwen asked in a soft, motherly voice.

The children remained silent.

"I used to be a servant for your father," Merlin began. As soon as the words left his lips, there was a light sparked in the twins' eyes.

They both gasped. "Uncle Merlin!" they shouted, and ran up to hug him.

Merlin, surprised, was nearly toppled over by the sudden bodies. He looked up to see Gwen shaking, laughing into her hand.

"They-" Merlin stuttered. "They know my name. How do they-"

"I told them about the times before they were born," she explained. "The story of their father, and how they came to be. Of course it wouldn't be _nearly_ complete without his faithful servant, Merlin."

Soon after, the twins started to fight, so they let go of Merlin and ran down the corridor. Gwen didn't stop them, but shouted for them to be careful as they played.

"They're beautiful," Merlin commented, looking after them. Then he looked back to Gwen. "How much do they know?" he asked, standing up.

"They don't know much," she responded. "They're so young. But I tell them stories sometimes to put them to sleep. Their father's great legacy, mostly. How we met, and our story."

Merlin smiled, remembering the times many years ago, watching the love of a prince and a serving girl blossom into the most magnificent love there ever was.

"And, of course, how you always helped us. With your magic, you know."

Merlin's heart stopped at the word. He searched Gwen's face for any signs of hostility, but found only the soft kindness of her usual demeanor.

"Yes," she explained, "I know about your magic." She paused. "At the battle, three years ago, there was an old sorcerer aiding Arthur from the hills. He was standing there, focused only on Arthur. I've never seen anyone so dedicated. Then after the battle, both Arthur and the old man disappeared. I had a feeling it was you, but I didn't know for sure. But Gaius helped, gave me a little hint."

Merlin chuckled, of course it was Gaius. "What did he say?" he asked, giving his legs a quick dust off.

"Well, as soon as I saw the old sorcerer, I knew something was strange if he was helping Arthur. I asked Gaius if he knew him, he said he did. And there was a strange familiarity in his eyes. So I asked him, well I asked if I knew him as well. He said I did. I put the pieces together fairly quickly."

"Is he still..." Merlin began, not sure if he really wanted to hear the answer.

"Yes, he is still here, and is still court physician... but he has been ill for a while now. Though I'm more than sure that a visit from you would help."

"I'm sorry I never told you about my magic before I left, I just needed to get away."

"It's alright Merlin, I understand why you left. We can talk more later over dinner perhaps, you must be hungry. But I think right now you should go and see Gaius, he could really use a visit from you."

Merlin walked quickly up the stairs, excited to be reunited with his old friend. When he opened the door he saw Gaius standing by a table, he coughed as he staggered to get a bottle from across the room. Merlin could see that he was still wearing his nightgown even though it was midday, and he still hadn't noticed Merlin standing in the doorway. "Still here then?" he called.

Gaius turned, shocked by the familiar voice.

"Merlin? You're home!"

Merlin walked up to him. "Yeah. Yeah, I'm home." He hugged his mentor.

"Where have you been, you look different. Older." This was true; Merlin had changed a bit over the few years, he stood taller with a bit more muscle, his eyes were deep and heavy, but still the magnificent light blue they had always been. Around his mouth was rougher and slightly grey, and his hair was longer and messier than usual. He wore his same jacket, blue top, and red neck scarf, but they seemed to have more stains of dirt and blood, and had a few loose ends around the bottom. He wore a big flowing hooded cape, it was the same red as the ones the knights wore, but it was bigger and didn't have the Camelot crest on it it. It had rips and mud all over the bottom. His trousers were a dark grey and his boots were the same as always. He had his old satchel bag, and in his hand he held the staff he had claimed when he defeated the Shees at the lake of Avalon after they tried to sacrifice Arthur.

How could he explain where he'd been? Where even _had_ he been? "A bit of everywhere."

Gaius gestures to the old set of stairs at the end of the room. "You can have your old room back. Well. Unless you'd rather like somewhere else in the castle, now that you're not a servant anymore."

Merlin put a hand on Gaius's shoulder. "I'd love to have my old room back."

"Ok well you go and unpack and I'll get changed. I wasn't expecting company since Gwen hasn't been able to visit me as much because of the twins. You've seen the twins, haven't you?"

"Yeah, I've seen them. Beautiful kids." He hesitated. "They look like him."

"Yes," Gaius thought. "Yes they do."

Merlin headed up the familiar steep steps to his old room, not much had changed except it was tidier. The bed looked like it had barely been slept in, Gaius must have only slept in it when he had a patient stay in his quarters. There was a few boxes of old herbs and medicine scattered around the room. Merlin leaned his staff against the wall and placed his bag on his bed. He undid the buckles and slid out the old book of magic which took up most of the space in his bag. The sorcerer didn't need the book anymore, he had memorised and mastered every spell, and could do a lot of them without needing the incantation, but it never seemed he could give the old book up. Maybe it was because Gaius had given it to him when he first arrived in Camelot. Merlin had promised that he would study every word, and he had. He flicked through the book.

" _Forbena"_ he whispered.

At once all the candles burst to life with tongues of fire. Merlin muttered another spell and they all went out. He loved the feeling of being back in his room, practicing small tricks. He took of his long cape, folded it up, and chucked it in the corner. After a while he headed back down to see Gaius dressed, and looking a lot brighter.

"I've left out a bucket of water for you. You could use a bath."

Merlin raised one eyebrow and gave a small smile. "Thanks?"

After he had freshened up, he sat down and told Gaius about the adventures and mishaps he had had over the years he had been away.


	2. Chapter 2

As Merlin was finishing his story, a guard entered the small chambers. "The queen has requested than Merlin join her for dinner in the great hall." Merlin stood up and looked down at Gaius, who was still sitting. "Would you like to join us? I'm sure Gwen won't mind." He felt bad leaving his friend, knowing that it was loneliness that had made Gaius so ill.

"No no, she will want to speak to you. Besides, I have some things to do."

Merlin looked back at Gaius. "Ok then, I won't be back too late."

Just as Merlin was about to leave Gaius called out to him "And, Merlin. It's good to have you back." Merlin smiled back and left the room.

He walked down the towards the great hall. Without his cloak and staff, Merlin looked almost exactly the same as always.

When he got to the great hall, Gwen was standing outside the entrance, waiting for him. When Merlin reached Gwen, he gave a small bowing gesture with his head. "Your majesty." He looked around. "Will Arthur and Arden be joining us tonight?" The names still played strangely on his tongue.

"No, but they have insisted that you tuck them in tonight." She gave a sigh of laughter. "Come on," she said, as she began to lead Merlin back to the children's chamber.

When they reached the door, Merlin noticed the familiarity and realised that it was the chamber right next to Arthur and Gwen's. Gwen must have stayed there.

She gave a soft knock on the door. "Arthur, Arden." Her voice was soft. She had always had motherly features about her; she was gentle, kind, and patient. Gwen opened the door, and the first thing Merlin noticed was the cleanliness room. He had never known children to be so tidy, but then again, they probably had servants to clean up after them.

As he entered further, Merlin began to see the separation between Arthur's side of the room and Arden's. The room was split into two sections, with curtained pillars against the left and right wall, separating the sleeping area and the play area. Near the door was a big stone fire, with the brick around the front of the fire's mouth built higher so the children couldn't easily fall in. The top of the fire was decorated with candles, a vase with flowers, a hand carved wooden dragon and above it, and a Camelot shield. On the other side of the room, a table, slightly lower than a normal one, with two seats on either side, again it had a vase of flowers. Against the left wall, near the table was a smaller table with two small wooden cups and a tall handled vase of water. Merlin started to walk through the room to the other side of the pillars. Each child had a four post king size bed with a large stained glass window behind the back bored, a bedside table, a chest at the end of the bed, a small cupboard and a changing screen. On Arthur's side he had a small wooden sword and shield, his bed sheets were a faded red with a few golden Camelot dragons stitched into the fabric, the curtain over his bed was the same red as his sheets. next to his bed he had a children's book about knights and dragons. Arden's sheets were a light lavender with flowers stitched onto the fabric and a lavender curtain over the bed, her bedsheets reminded Merlin of the dress Gwen use to wear when she was a servant. On Arden's bedside table she had a wooden vase of handpicked flowers and a brush, on her bed there was a hand made horse teddy, made from a soft white fabric. Between the two bedside tables there was a tall, thin stained glass window and in front of it was a small wooden rocking chair. Both children were sitting on their beds, with the covers pulled over them, eagerly waiting for Merlin.

Merlin sat on the chair, unsure of what to do, other than Mordred he had never spent much time with young children. Arthur suddenly burst to life "Show us some of you magic uncle Merlin!"

"Yeah please, oh please, mummy told us so much about it!" Arden chimed in.

Merlin looked towards Gwen who was still standing in the doorway, she gave a small nod. Merlin looked around trying to think of what to do, maybe make the fire of the candles mounted on the wall flout in the air, then he spotted the horse, sitting on Arden's bed, he lifted his hand up to the horse, Arden looked back and forth between Merlin and her toy, curiosity and excitement filled her big blue-brown eyes.

Merlin took a breath in. " _Cóm_ _aet_ _lif._ " Merlin's eyes flashed gold as the horse lifted its head, and started to gallop up, Merlin's hand guiding it, it nuzzled Arden's cheek. Both children screamed with joy. Then, Merlin drew back his hand, letting the magic stop, the horse landing softly on Arden's lap.

The girl gasped. "Wow!"

It took the two children a while to process what had just happened, even Gwen seemed in awe.

"Show us more, please!" Arthur bursted to life again.

Arden joined in the pleading. "Tell us what you did when you were away!"

"Wanna see my sword skills!" Arthur went to clamber off the bed to grab his wooden sword.

"Maybe tomorrow." Gwen had begun to walk across the room. "Maybe Merlin would like to join us for a ride tomorrow?"

Merlin looked up at Gwen. "I'd love to."

The proposal was greeted with cheers from the twins.

Gwen tucked Arthur under the covers, kissed him softly on the head and whispered, "Good night." She then went over and did the same to Arden who was now cuddling with her horse. Merlin stood up and closed the curtains behind him.

"Arthur, Arden. Aren't you going to say goodnight to Merlin?"

" _Goodnight, Uncle Merlin,"_ called the twins

Merlin gave a sigh of laughter. He found being called _Uncle Merlin_ strange, but he was slowly getting used to it, and kind of liked it. "Goodnight Arthur, Goodnight Arden." Merlin and Gwen left the room and headed back down to the great hall for dinner.

"They are very sweet," Merlin said, as dinner was beginning to be served.

"Thank you," the queen replied.

"They have no fear of my magic," he observed. "I assume you've never told them what it can do to people?"

"I didn't want them to grow up fearing magic like me and Arthur did, but I did tell them that some people had gone bad because they didn't understand their power. I didn't tell them much, I thought it was best if you did. I mean unless you don't want to, and I would completely understand if you didn't..."

Merlin missed Gwen's ramblings when she thought she had upset someone. "I agree," he cut in as to stop her. "But I'll wait until their older. No need to worry them now." Gwen nods in agreement.

Merlin is offered wine by a pale serving boy.

"No, thank you, just water please." The boy brings over the goblet of water and is about to pour it into Merlin's cup, when Merlin puts up his hand to stop him. "Please, allow me."

"But sir, you are a guest to the Queen." The boy's voice is quiet and shaky.

"Please, I insist." Merlin takes the pitcher, and pours himself some water and returns to enjoying his soup.

"Would you like a chamber in the castle, now that you have returned?" Gwen asked hesitantly, hoping her friend was staying.

"No thank you," he replied. Her heart sunk, but quickly rose again when Merlin continued, "I think I'll stay with Gaius for now, to keep him company. And to keep an eye on him." Gwen nodded understandingly. "Besides, I'm not really into all that comfort and big pillows stuff."

"Really?" Gwen asked, amused.

"Yeah," he said, "comfort, relaxing, it's boring."

Gwen looked down at her plate, shaking her head and laughing.

Merlin gives a small laugh at his own joke, and suddenly realised this is the first time he's actually laughed since the war with Morgana.

Gwen looked up. She had more important matters to talk about. "Gaius said you are the most powerful sorcerer to ever walk the earth."

Merlin nodded as he swallowed his soup. "That is what the Druids say."

Gwen was taken aback. How could Merlin - the scrawny, clumsy serving boy she had know for years - be the most powerful man on the planet? She had always know there was something about Merlin, but this? "Do you think you could. Possibly. Maybe, show me a bit?" Her eyes were full of curiosity.

Merlin looked over to the serving boy and back at Gwen. He wasn't comfortable showing anyone too soon. Once Gwen had asked the boy to leave, Merlin put his hand out to a loaf of bread that was sitting beside Gwen. Without saying a word, his eyes glowed and the bread shot into his hand like an arrow out of a crossbow. Merlin looked down at the bread, and let go of it, letting it sit in the air for a while before dropping back into its original place.

"The first time I met Gaius, I save saved his life. He was standing on a banister and I scared him, then I used my magic to move a bed to break his fall. He insisted I told him how I did it. I'd never studied magic, it wasn't until a good while after that we both learnt how I got it. Truth is, I was born with it. Never needed to study."

"Amazing," his friend cooed. "Can you... do something else for me?" Gwen looked over at Merlin and he knew exactly what he should do. He put down his spoon and muttered a word. In a flash all the candles in the room went out and the room was left in darkness. Gwen gave a gasp.

" _Forbena."_ At once all the candles sprang back to life with tongues of fire. Gwen looked around, amazed, before sitting up just a little straighter. "Merlin, I was wondering if you would like to become court sorcerer?"

He was surprised at her outrightness. " _Really?"_

"Absolutely."

"A court sorcerer?"

"Times are changing," she admitted, "ever so slowly, and I think it would send a good message to my people to know that they are welcome here. Camelot has gone through some rough times, and we have been through a few wars since Arthur's death, and I could use your help. Not just you magic but your guidance, too. You were closer to Arthur than anyone else."

"I will have to think about it, but Gwen, you already have my guidance and help."

The queen gave a kind smile. "Of course, take all the time you need."

They finished dinner, and Merlin headed back to Gaius's chambers. When he entered, he could hear that Gaius was already asleep. He crept silently through the room. It was clear that the time Merlin had been away had made him become much lighter and more agile on his feet.

He immediately crawled into his old cot. After a long day, the comfort of long-lost memories lulled him to sleep.


	3. Chapter 3

Merlin awoke to the sound of birds, and light hitting his eyes. For a moment, it seemed just the same as it had been three years ago. Until he looked over at the wall, and saw the cape and staff he had been carrying for the last few years. Then, nothing was the same. The empty bliss was filled again by the bricks he had carried since he left. He stood up, and decided to wander the castle just to make it feel like home once more.

It seemed funny to Merlin how after three years of trying to forget this place, he still remembered every hall, every corridor, every event that happened in every room. As much as he tried to bury the memories, he couldn't forget them. And now that he was back, he was immensely glad of it.

After wandering for a little while, he returned to Gaius's chambers to find breakfast nearly ready for him. Gaius turned around, surprised at his entrance.

"Merlin! I thought you were still in bed, I was going to surprise you."

"Well," the sorcerer said, smiling, "I am thoroughly surprised."

Set on the table was his favorite breakfast, one that Gaius had only made once before, on the day of Arthur and Gwen's wedding. The thought of it made Merlin sick, remembering the day, remembering his friend... but there was also warmth and familiarity there. He wasn't alone anymore; he was exactly where he was meant to be. He knew that one day those grievous feelings would turn to happy memories, and there was comfort in that. He sat down at the table, grinning widely.

"What did it take to get all this?"

Setting a plate down on the table in front of him, Gaius responded, "Not much, actually. Gwen lets me take nearly whatever I want from the kitchens nowadays."

"That's very kind of her," Merlin commented, already diving in.

"Yes, well, she said it was paying me back for all the help I've offered her through the years. She's got a lot on her plate, with the twins, and she's grateful for any help she can get."

Merlin looked up from his plate to find Gaius staring him straight in the eyes. This was a familiar look; there was something Gaius was trying to get from him. And Merlin knew exactly what that was.

"So you know what she offered me, then?"

"She's very adamant about what she wants."

"People will be afraid. A court sorcerer? That's a big change."

"Most may be. But I've grown to trust Gwen's plans. They've worked so far, and she really knows her people."

Merlin was silent for a while, pondering.

"What are you thinking?"

"I don't know." The boy paused. "I should take it, shouldn't I."

"She certainly thinks so. I think so. I mean, since you're here anyways..."

"What makes you think I'll be staying?" Merlin asked, knowing he probably would but wondering why Gaius is so sure of it.

His mentor only laughed. "Oh, Merlin. I know you're not going to leave. Don't be so ridiculous. I know you too well for that." He stood to clean off his plate.

Merlin smiled to himself. Gaius was right, there was no way he would leave his home so soon.

Later that day, Merlin headed out to the courtyard to meet Gwen and the twins. He hadn't ridden a horse since he left Camelot three years ago, and if the twins were anything like Arthur, they'd be very judgemental of his inexperience.

As he approached the horse stable, he saw that Gwen and the twins were nowhere to be found. He walked in, anyways. The horses moved away at his entrance, but soon recognised him. Even after three years, it seemed, Merlin realised that some things don't change.

Suddenly, he felt a little body hugging his leg, and another on the opposite side. He smiled, looking down. It's was the twins. Behind him, Gwen was standing at the door, smiling.

"Ready, Merlin?"

"Of course."

In minutes they were riding out the front gate. Arthur and Arden were still too young to be on their own, so Gwen took Arwen in front of her and Merlin took Arthur. He followed Gwen's lead to a clearing in forest, away from the chaos of the citadel. Gwen put down the picnic basket one of her servants had prepared.

"It's awfully heavy," she said to Merlin. "Would you mind?" She smiled, and he knew what she was asking.

Still uneasy about doing magic in front of people, he put his arm up, slowly, never breaking eye contact with Gwen to check for any signs of hostility. Finding none whatsoever, he recites a spell in his head and the blanket unfolds before them.

Arthur and Arden turned away from their play and gasped at uncle Merlin does more spells. Suddenly, fruit, bread, meat, and cheese all come out of the basket, too. The children gasp louder and run up to their picnic. Gwen and Merlin both laughed at the wonder filling the eyes of the kids before them. They all sat down and began to eat.

But the children were soon distracted. Arthur took out his sword and practiced his skills against a nearby tree.

"You're doing very well, Arthur. Don't hurt the tree too bad, you're so strong it might fall over!" Merlin smiled as Arthur, very proud of the complement, proceeded to swing at the tree even harder.

"You know, Merlin," Gwen said. "I was still wondering about... you know."

"You're never giving up, are you?" he asked. Looking over, seeing her big, brown eyes staring straight into his, he already knew her answer. Just then, little Arden rushed over, presenting Merlin with a handful of fresh-picked flowers that she found. And thinking to himself, he realised, he already knew his, too. He picked out one of the flowers, and placed it behind Arden's ear. She laughed, and ran away, blushing. "Alright. As long as I'm sticking around, I might as well."

Gwen grinned. "Finally." Then she thought for a moment. "It's not going to be easy, you know. People don't like change."

"I know," Merlin responded.

"But," she said, "my people trust me. I'm no Arthur, but I suppose if I was good enough for him, I'm good enough for them."

"Better than good, I'd say," her friend responded. "You understand them. You weren't raised in royalty, so you know their struggle and their pain. You're not just Arthur's wife, you're Gwenevere."

"Thank you, Merlin. You're a true friend, you know."

When the company had finished their picnic, it was time to return to the castle. They folded up the blanket, returned the plates to the basket, and mounted their horses, homeward bound. The children laughed and attempted a game between the horses (it didn't really work out) while Gwen and Merlin discussed all the duties and jurisdictions of a court sorcerer.

Before they had even reached the edge of the woods, An arrow fired from the brush, heading straight for Merlin's head. He caught in the corner of his eye and sent it off course into a nearby tree. The horses stopped in their tracks, and became incredible jittery. Merlin and Gwen exchanged a worried look, and suddenly bandits appeared out of the woods around them. Within seconds, the four were surrounded. The men crept closer and closer, weapons drawn. Before they had time to strike, Merlin tilted his head down slightly and lifted his arm, keeping the other around Arthur's side and holding tightly onto the horse's reins. Without saying a word, his eyes lit up, sending them all flying into various trees and rocks. "You were more than good enough for him." Merlin responded, even more serious than before "He loved you more than anything, it was always so obvious, a blind man could have seen it."


	4. Chapter 4

That night Merlin and Gaius had a meal of chicken and fresh vegetables, complements of the queen. Gaius watched Merlin pick at his food, knowing there was something on the sorcerer's mind.

Merlin looked up at Gaius. "Do many people know about my powers?" he asked.

"I do not think so, why?"

Merlin took a breath. "When we were attacked, that arrow was aimed at me. Not Gwen, not Arthur, not even Arden. It was heading straight for _me._ "

"Wasn't Arthur sitting on the horse with you? Maybe they had a bad aim," Gaius responded, trying to see reason.

"No, I could feel it, it was shot straight at my head. If whoever it was thought I was just a servant they wouldn't have bothered with me. They must know that I have magic, that I'm standing between them and the thrown."

Gaius looked at the boy curiously. He would have been worried if it weren't for Merlin's immense powers. "How would they have found out?"

Merlin thought about it for a moment. "You sure you haven't told anyone?"

The old man shook his head. "I haven't breathed a word."

"Then it must be someone in Camelot, someone close to the queen."

Gaius sighed. "Maybe you're over thinking it Merlin. Ask around, maybe Gwen or one of the knights had told someone and it spread."

Merlin exhaled. "I hope you're right."

"Besides, soon you will be made court sorcerer and everyone will know."

Merlin let out a breath, and forced himself to smile. He had nearly forgotten about that. "Yeah." His whole life was changing, not only was he free to be himself but he was going to be thanked for his powers.

A thought came to Merlin that night. Maybe he could convince Gwen to let magic be free again, maybe he still had a chance to unite the lands of Albion, but would it work without Arthur? The questions swirled, dizzying, around his brain, until he fell into an unrestful sleep.

Merlin woke late the next morning, and the thought returned to his mind the moment he opened his eyes. He sat in his bed staring at the ceiling, pondering, until another thought joined the fuzzy daze. _Kilgharrah would know._ But Kilgharrah had died, only a year ago.

Merlin had stayed with the great dragon in the last few months before he passed, bringing his food and trying to find a way to keep him strong. He remembered what the dragon had said the night before he died, when Merlin had tried every spell he knew, begging the dragon to stay with him. "Merlin I am old; I have lived for hundreds of years. I am ready to go." The sorcerer could still remember the feeling of tears in his eyes as he prepared to lose another friend. "I have taught you everything I know, now go and use it."

The words stuck with merlin as he lay in his bed. If Kilgharrah had known about Arthur and Arden, wouldn't he have told Merlin? Perhaps he didn't know because they weren't important? If he had known, would it have changed his mind? Maybe he wanted Merlin to work it out himself. The last of the dragon's many confusing riddles.

The thoughts continued to spin through his mind until Gaius entered the room.

"Merlin it's getting late." He noticed that Merlin was staring at the ceiling. "Merlin, are you alright?"

Merlin swallowed. " _Yeah._ Just, thinking."

"Well, we both know how bad that is for you." They both gave a small laugh. "You should get up, it's getting late."

Merlin was strolling through the castle when he saw Gwen and the twins. The twins saw Merlin immediately. "Uncle Merlin!" they yelled, and ran up to him as if it had been years since they last saw him.

Gwen soon joined Merlin as he was being overwhelmed, trying to talk to both twins at once. "Merlin? I was wondering if we could talk about the ceremony."

"Of course."

A loud growl came from the pit of Merlin stomach, he tried to hold back his redness as the twins giggled

Gwen smiled "maybe over breakfast?"

Merlin and Gwen sat across from each other at the long table, with the twins sitting across from each other in the middle. Merlin and Gwen discussed the ceremony while the twins ate, getting more of their food on them than in them.

Finishing breakfast, Merlin whipped his mouth before saying, "I think I might go for a ride."

Gwen looked startled at first before giving Merlin a warm smile "Of course, it is a lot to take in. You can go to the stable and choose your new horse from the there if you like." "Thank you," he replied before leaving.

When Merlin entered the stables, something caught his eye, the dark brown horse he use to ride. When he went to stroke it, it was clear that the horse remembered Merlin, as it nuzzled him fondly.

After checking with the stable boy that the horse was ok to take and putting on the tack, even though the stable boy insisted that he did it, Merlin rode off through the courtyard and out of the gates.

He continued through the forest until he reached the open bank of the lake of Avalon.

He sat there, staring into the ripples in the water

"You'd be proud of her Arthur" his voice was quiet and dry

"You would be proud of everything she had done for Camelot" a tear started to run down his cheek "and the twins, they're amazing they are kind just like Gwen" tears hit the water "I see so much of you in both of them" he wiped his eyes with his sleeve "You would love them"

He stared across the lake, a thousand images running through his mind, wondering if things could have been different.


End file.
